Anyway...I'll let the pictures speak for themselves.
Remember when???
And now!!!
"Why do I have to get all dressed up???"
Beautiful Princess
"Whatcha doin???"
Eily and Friends
Blowing out the candles
CAKE!!!!
All in all it was a good day for Ms. Eily. Not so much for me. I love my daughter...couldn't be more proud of her and how big and mature she is getting. But along with all the usual, "Oh my, my baby is getting bigger!!" feelings that go into days like today, there was a discernible emptiness to the day.
It is a terrible thing for a little girl to pass yet another birthday and not have her mother there...especially one so young. As I stood there watching the festivities and seeing all these other mom's interacting with their children...several of which were pregnant again...I just can't help but feel horrible for my daughter...the little girly things she's missing out on...not having the love and affection of her mother. It just kills me inside.
I try my hardest...but I can never be Christy. I can't replace the things that she would have given Eilish. Seeing how Eily interacted and gravitated to all the moms in the room just drove that home in a way that I don't think I've ever really appreciated to this point. I think a small part of me somewhere was still telling me that I could do it all...I could be both parents and Eily would be just fine...she wouldn't miss out on anything.
After today, I now know that isn't true...my poor babies.
3 comments:
Happy Birthday Eily!
((hugs)) to you, Brent.
My sister is raising her two kiddos alone after losing her husband.
I can't believe Eily is 4 ! What a gorgeous little lady.
I can't help but think how fortunate your children are to have you as their daddy. It is so clear that they are in capable and loving hands. While I imagine that it doesn't always feel like that for you, I just wanted you to know that from the outside I see a single parent giving more than what some two parent families do.
Am thinking of you and your babies.
My little girl Abi thinks Eily is very pretty and said "I would like to play with that little girl!" (she is 3). Let me know if you would like to get the girls together - Lisa and Abi (we are in Maple Valley, WA)
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